Massive bandom rec post number one

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So I have been reading bandom fic pretty much nonstop for two weeks, and earlier I said unto lurkmuch, "I feel like I just ate two crates of marshmallow peeps. Except with my brain."

They were so sparkly and sugary and gooshy! I just could not help myself. And now I share with you. By the way, I've been compiling this rec list for about six hours now, but it is about a fourth of what I wanted to rec today. So I am guessing there will be more in the future.

Hey, it might help if you know who these people are, assuming you are like me and haven't watched MTV since 1999. femmequixotic made a great intro primer with pictures and quotes; frankly, that's all I go on for reading most of this, though I also am moved by the preciousness of txtequilanights's Patrick Stump/Pete Wentz primer (with video, slow-loading), bexless's Frank Iero/Gerard Way picspam, and of course, blushandrecover's Pete Wentz / Mikey Way primer, which is vital because otherwise at some point you will find yourself shouting "WHAT IS THE SUMMER OF LIKE?" at the screen.

So with some context under your belt, you can better appreciate the fine buffet of fanfiction options which bandom presently provides, which include:

Stories about Pete Wentz's predilection for jailbait

These are usually kind of wrong and also hot.

Patricksitting by adellyna, Pete/Patrick, NC-17. Patrick is all of sixteen, and Pete is supposed to keep an eye on him while his parents are out of town. Good god, what were Patrick's parents thinking. Jesus. I would quote my favorite line here but it is smack in the middle of the porn and thus constitutes a spoiler. The thing. On the couch. With the hair. Holy shit. This is the first story I ever liked in bandom!

The Last Good Thing About This Part of Town, just_katarin, Pete/Patrick, R (I call that a flailingly hard R). Pete is Patrick's Civics teacher. Pete is 23, Patrick is 17, there is pining and forbidden love and skeevy power dynamics and HOTNESS.

A Five-Letter Word Meaning Ardor, iphignia939, Pete/Patrick, NC-17. I think Patrick is sixteen in this one, maybe, possibly. Features Pete giving Patrick a talk about sexuality and his feelings! Also, shenanigans.

(iphignia939 is going to wreck the author-balance in this post, because so far everything I read of hers is love. You should also totally read the 18 (Glenview) AUs - a pair of stories where Pete and Patrick meet in the m4m ads on Craigslist. Both NC-17, which, 17 is also Patrick's age here, hey.

we could make beautiful music together - 18 (Glenview) adorable internet dating and awkward phone sex

i like finger instruments and mouth organs" -- 18 (glenview), PETE WENTZ, DESPOILER OF VIRGINS.)

Breaking Arrangements, violentfires, Pete/Patrick, NC-17. Okay, this one doesn't go there age-wise, but it is in the Early Years and it involves bed-sharing and failed stealth masturbation. \o/

And for something completely different: This story's going somewhere, by jamjar, Patrick/Pete, AU in which Patrick is 23 and Pete is 17. Mid-R, no real porn because Patrick is the mature one either way, but I love this version of Pete.

Crackalicious AUs!

The Only Two Stories Ever Told, bexless, Frank/Gerard and Pete/Patrick, R. So Gerard's an unhappy undertaker's apprentice? And Frank's a gypsy? And Patrick's a closeted grocery's son? Whatever, it's completely brilliant. Also, I think stories written in the informal what-if style are really interesting.

Tie your Monster Down, stereomer, NC-17, Frank/Gerard. Hyperviolent and really plotty, in which Gerard is head of a team of secret agents.

Did you clean those pants with windex? (Because I Can Practically See Myself in Them), adellyna, and the only time I have ever typed "G" under rating. Author's summary: Patrick works at the local library! Pete would kind of like to hold his hand.

Gerard Way Would Totally Save Your Life, Too, If You Weren't Such An Asshat, shanalle, PG-13, Patrick/Gerard. In which Gerard Way is an obnoxious campus activist who keeps getting arrested, and Patrick Stump just wants to pass his composition class without his roommate throwing away all Patrick's leather shoes or something. You guys know me: I love this AU because I was Gerard in college, or possibly spent all of college trying to get in the pants of people just like him. Anyway, this story is precious.

All your favorite cliches from SGA! We got yer genderswap, your sex pollen, your wingfic, your mpreg...

Sex Pollen

King of the Boudoir, giddygeek, Pete/Patrick NC-17. Pete gets sex-vodooed, and then there's funny porn. Second-favorite line:
"Oh my God, I so do not have time for this," Pete says, reaching for his belt buckle. "Seriously, get naked. I'll explain later." (Also, giddygeek probably has no clue who I am but she's high on the list of people I miss seeing around in SGA. I keep running into these people in bandom.)

Happy with the Consequence, txtequilanights, Pete/Patrick, NC-17. Patrick gets sex pollened, and then there's straight-faced porn.

Fantasy Book by cimness, Frank/Gerard, NC-17. Gerard gets sex pollened, and then Frank feels really guilty! But there's still porn.

And probably the dirtiest thing on this rec list, may be naked now, disarm_d and untappedbeauty, Spencer/Brandon, NC-17. Do not read this if you already feel morally queasy about the dubcon inherent in the sex pollen trope? But if that is something you have Come to Terms With, this is long and dark and really pornily good.

Mpreg! Also, gender!preg!

Asking to be Born, longtime_lurker, NC-17. Pete gets knocked up. Also, the header on her journal is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen on the (bandom) internet ever.

Kidfic genderswap production, by pearl_o and etben, Pete/Mikey, Pete/Patrick, Mikey/Alicia, in which Mikey Way is a girl, Pete knocks her up during that summer they hung out a lot, and then everything turns out adorable.

Wingfic!

Marabou, provetheworst, NC-17. Pete wakes up with wings, he, um, needs Patrick to come help him wash them in the hot tub, what, they're hard to reach!

Of All the Angles, ofkitchensinks, PG, Bob/Mikey, Bob/Gerard. Bob Bryar has wings, he's always had wings, he does not want to talk about it, and no, you can not touch them.

Bodyswap!

trade baby blues for wide-eyed browns, provetheworst Pete and Patrick bodyswap, pg-13. Favorite line: "Just because I'm vegan," Andy says. "Just because I'm vegan does not mean I know magic." It didn't work for me either, Andy but keep trying.

That is so punk rock, ficbyzee, NC-17. Pete Wentz and Bob Bryer swap bodies and it is all complicated. (Frank/Pete, Frank/Bob, which are kind of rare pairings even without the crack, so. Win!).

Wake up and notice you're someone you're not, lordessrenegade, NC-17, Pete/Patrick, Frank/Gerard, minor Patrick/Gerard. Patrick and Frank switch bodies, and Bob tries to cure them with Harry Potter fanfiction, and also, there's hotness.

Genderswap!

Woman like a Man, longtimelurker, NC-17,

Pete/Patrick. Pete wakes up a girl. You know, it's hard to do a good rec of a story this well-written on a rec sprint like this, but I'm going to turn down the capslock for a bit and say that I love how this evolves. And the porny bits make me type nrrrgh and remember why I love genderswap.

just like Virginia Woolf, iphignia939, NC-17 Pete/Patrick. Patrick wakes up a girl, but he's Patrick and he's stubborn and Pete is protective and trying not to be a pervert. For a while, at least. Actually features the actual phrase *I'm* the one getting treated like a dildo with an attitude problem.

Random ot3 genderswap ficlet by pearl_o, NC-17, Mikey/Pete/Alicia, in which Pete turns into a girl and shows up at Mikey Way's door demanding the ladysex with his wife. And the story is pretty much the rest of that conversation. I offer it up as justification for why I keep stalking pearl_o's fic posts.

Stories with all of the above! Also, stories where Pete is actually a fairy.

Play This Record in Reverse by madsciencechick, which is ageswap mpreg wingfic with telepathy and invisibility and it's really, really good. Pete/Mikey, Pete/Patrick, maybe an R?

and the moon in their net, iphignia939, low NC-17. Pete is part faerie, he pissed off Queen Mab, and now the band has to play for their lives. You thought I was joking about the fairies, but I wasn't!

Change (In the House of Pete), lierdumoa PG-15. Pete is mostly faerie and needs Patrick to help raise his changeling love child. \o/
...

By the way, if you are related to me, uninterested in bandom, or likely to be traumatized by the existence of Pete Wentz mpreg, don't click the cuttag. I just mention this because Caffininni told me what you did, frickin_cheng!

So, yes. Next up: high school AUs, kidfic fluff, unabashed smut with no major theme. Also, I want to note that putting together this rec list felt a little like cheating because I've been reading exclusively from murklins's del.icio.us and northernskyy's del.icio.us. (If anyone knows who northernskyy is on lj, please alert me!). I'm sure there's badfic in bandom, but thanks to those two's intrepid cataloging skills I have not read, like, any. I recommend both their del.icio.uses for further reading.